Naturally, the output of blockbusters is always a mixed bag--some are terrible, some are okay, and a few are surprisingly good. There are a healthy number of indie and arthouse films that offer interesting experiences that are genuinely worth seeing (of course, everyone's mileage will vary with these). Streaming offers probably more new "content" than I can keep up with. I can see how some of it can be seen as bland, fluffy, pointless material that only exists to lure in subscribers (Disney is probably the biggest offender, because of course they are). And yet, I find that some of these are enjoyable all the same.
If there's any specific thing about the last year that stuck out to me, it's simply in big the horror scene seems to be these days. I suppose it has been for a while thanks to the cheapness of making horror films and how easy it is for them to be streamed. Aside from some sequels (one more Halloween, one more Predator, a Hellraiser reboot), we've had films like Nope, Smile, Glorious, and the first two parts of Ti West's X trilogy (X and Pearl--MaXXXene is coming next year). At least a couple more Stephen King (re)adaptations were put out, and his son's story The Black Phone was made into a dang decent film. I saw a couple of new shark movies this year (man, they were terrible), and there are a few good thrillers (like Fall). Even bigger films manage to exude a horror vibe, what with Morbius morbin' all over the place, The Batman channeling David Fincher for sheer mood (thanks Matt Reeves, I love it), and the latest Doctor Strange film indulging in jump-scares and the macabre (thanks Sam Raimi, I love it). Isn't it weird that out of the two Pinocchio adaptations, it's the scary one by Guillermo Del Toro that actually sticks? Even the cult films (Crimes of the Future, The Northman) and arthouse darlings (The Menu, Triangle of Sadness, TÁR) come off as the stuff of nightmares.
It's not all doom and gloom though--there's plenty of color, humor, and energy put into most animated films (Turning Red, Lightyear, Strange World), superhero films (Thor: Love and Thunder), sequels (Sonic 2, Hocus Pocus 2, Disenchanted), and other odd films (Marcel the Shell with Shoes On, Weird: The Al Yankovic Story, The Munsters, Bullet Train, The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent). I find that my opinions on these are all over the place, but I certainly appreciate the entertainment they bring and I find many of these charming.
In the last few years, I noted that I've been becoming more critical as I've matured more. The downside to this is that I might forget why I was attracted to certain films in the first place, but this year there have been at least a couple that have reminded me of things I used to love. One instance happened with the crazy Indian film you can stream on Netflix: RRR. The style of it is as subtle as a baton to the face, but the sheer absurdity of its presentation definitely charmed me. Watching crazy, stupid things like a guy diving into a crowd of rioters and fighting them with a stick, another guy throwing a motorcycle, or the spontaneous dance-off scene is a memorable experience, and I cherish this approach for the absurdism and imagination on display. There's a gleeful "anything goes" technique that I used to love in films by Timur Bekmambetov. It's something that guys like Roland Emmerich strive for all the time, but as this year's Moonfall proved, it often falls flat when there's no real spirit or heart put into it. RRR has spirit and heart in spades, and it makes its absurdity all the more effective.
One other surprise this year is a film I happened to watch on an airplane: a neat little sci-fi gem called Everything Everywhere All At Once. Why oh why did I watch this uncensored in full view of other passengers? This film didn't hold back on much, but thankfully nobody complained to me when the naughtier moments happened. I couldn't stop the movie anyway--once it picked up, it went full speed ahead through a perfect storm of unbridled absurdism, featuring high-speed action, gut-busting comedy, gushing melodrama, and an infinite stream of insane ideas. Aside from the sheer entertainment value, I related to the film immensely as it dipped into deeper themes and implications concerning family, the direction of life, tolerance, and nihilism (both cosmic and personal). Other people will probably pick up on other themes as well--the film is absolutely stuffed with things. It definitely bares its heart though, invoking a catharsis that feels well-earned and is quite moving. The presentation might seem garish, but like a piece of dadaist art, there is a purpose to the nonsense (even if nonsense itself is the purpose), and the maximalist approach is so bold that I can't help but to admire it. This is one of those films that feels bigger as it blows up and expands beyond its limitations. Chances are that this approach will influence me in my own creative efforts--sometimes you just have to give it your all, why not?
Maybe the most disappointing films are the ones that don't try nearly as hard. For what it's worth though, there are only a handful of films that I'd consider bad or disappointing. There are many that I'd peg as, simply, average or mediocre, leaving maybe 20 or so that I genuinely love. Compared to the last couple of years, it's a pretty good run actually.
As of today, I have seen 62 films from yesteryear. Some of the ones I haven't checked out yet are Aftersun, Decision to Leave, Babylon, The Whale, The Fablemans, Bodies Bodies Bodies, Barbarian, Blonde, Scream, The Lost City, Violent Night, Black Panther: Wakanda Forever, and Black Adam. If I do get around to seeing them, I will update my ranking on Letterboxd (maybe here too if I can find the time). As it is now though, here are my rankings for 2022:
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62: The Requin
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| In need of a bigger boat. |
Holy crap, I had no clue Alicia Silverstone is making movies these days.
She deserves better. The Requin is easily one of the dumbest movies I've seen this year. It's built on a ridiculous premise and strung together with a threadbare plot that's as improbable as it is shallow. The film often strives for emotional relevancy with some choice flashbacks, but they elicit shrugs more than insight. It's fun to laugh at the lame parts, but otherwise it's quite schlocky.
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61: Pinocchio (Robert Zemeckis)
Easily the worst Disney live-action remake I've seen. It starts off obnoxiously bad, twisting the narration in annoyingly weird and silly ways. It doesn't take long before Tom Hanks bumbles across each scene, mumbling like a madman in an incomprehensible accent (for the second time this year--this man deserves better). The film proceeds to simultaneously repeat key scenes in the original animated film and invent new subplots that don't lead anywhere. The whole endeavor is riddled with head-scratching decisions, but what really sticks out is the way it flaunts its CGI trickery--it might have worked in some movies, but without convincing or good CGI, it just comes off as gaudy and weird.
The worst shock about this is seeing the end credits and discovering that Robert Zemeckis directed this. I should have known given the movie's camera style, but this just makes me sad. The techniques and tricks that might have made films like The Polar Express magical and innovative are now being exploited in ways that are undisciplined, and the film is a hot mess as a result. The mighty have fallen indeed.
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60: Maneater
The other bad shark movie of the year, but it's a genuine shame that it's not an adaptation of the Maneater video game. This film is just like any other shark movie, horrible SFX, dumb characters, and all. This one has the distinction of having a more obnoxious soundtrack, and they really tried to push Trace Adkins as the shark-hunting badass hero (and the film even has sequel bait--I'm curious now if they have plans to cast Adkins in more of these like some kind of John Wick for sharks or something). The best that can be said is that it's not boring, and the scenery is nice.
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59: Expired
Loveland
In my search for even more science fiction, I inevitably had to see this cyberpunk drama that sounds cooler than it actually is. Even though the production quality is fair, the film runs so slowly and lifelessly that it's an absolute slog. The voices and voice-overs are mostly whispers, and I've seen one review accurately describe this as ASMR. If that's your kind of thing, then maybe the film will appeal more. Aside from the cool neon lights and such, I found little to love here.
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58: Death on the Nile
More of the same, really. By nature of the story, the Egyptian locales are a beautiful, eye-popping backdrop, but it remains the film's most captivating feature. As it is with Murder on the Orient Express, Kenneth Branagh lays the drama on thick, to the point where the actual mystery becomes smothered. It aims for dramatic reveals, but it comes off as a little too try-hard. In spite of this, the older film remains more entertaining than this.
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57: Ambulance
Although restraint has served Michael Bay well in the past, Ambulance seems so common and unremarkable that it didn't really captivate me much--not even with its intriguing plot (although, as I understand it, this is a remake of a German film with the same title and premise). Action and drone photography couldn't quite make up for the cardboard cut-out characters and cliched execution. It's by far the blandest Bay film I've seen, and while his excesses have plagued many of his earlier works, I would have appreciated at least a few more 'splosions and bad jokes.
It's also possible I wasn't in the right mood when I saw this--chances are that a re-evaluation will be warranted. If my opinion does change, I won't expect this to climb that much further up the list though.
This is it. This is the one. With the release of this singular title, we as a society and civilization have reached the peak of mediocrity. It is a film made with images and sound. There are actors. Jared Leto is one of them and he acts. Thankfully he acts more sanely than when he was the Joker, but still. Matt Smith acted the sh*t out of this, he is literally too good for this material. There are action scenes and special effects. There is a story where stuff happens--sometimes just because. Yes indeed, this is truly a film among films. I appreciate it for all the memes, which are truly some of the memes ever made.
So, this is how it ends, huh? With Michael Myers stuck in a sewer while some other dude steals his mask and kills some bullies?
I dunno, the film isn't nearly as "bad" as I expected, but it didn't leave me with a great impression either. The story is certainly a strange flex, although taken as a kind of Stephen King riff, I understand where it's coming from. Doesn't make it right for a Halloween movie though, and even though it does round off the franchise, I don't think I care enough about this resolution to feel satisfied. Between this and Kills, I'd have preferred it if they just ended the series with Myers burning to death at the end of the '18 film.
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56: Morbius
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| Morbin' time!!! |
This is it. This is the one. With the release of this singular title, we as a society and civilization have reached the peak of mediocrity. It is a film made with images and sound. There are actors. Jared Leto is one of them and he acts. Thankfully he acts more sanely than when he was the Joker, but still. Matt Smith acted the sh*t out of this, he is literally too good for this material. There are action scenes and special effects. There is a story where stuff happens--sometimes just because. Yes indeed, this is truly a film among films. I appreciate it for all the memes, which are truly some of the memes ever made.
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55: Halloween Ends
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| Evil didn't die that night I guess... |
So, this is how it ends, huh? With Michael Myers stuck in a sewer while some other dude steals his mask and kills some bullies?
I dunno, the film isn't nearly as "bad" as I expected, but it didn't leave me with a great impression either. The story is certainly a strange flex, although taken as a kind of Stephen King riff, I understand where it's coming from. Doesn't make it right for a Halloween movie though, and even though it does round off the franchise, I don't think I care enough about this resolution to feel satisfied. Between this and Kills, I'd have preferred it if they just ended the series with Myers burning to death at the end of the '18 film.
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54: Jackass Forever
I don't even know how to properly rank this. The film delivers just what it promises to, so one can't fault it for much. It's nothing artistically noteworthy, but it makes no pretense to be anything but a string of obnoxious, juvenile, and disgusting pranks. Much of it just makes me ask "why though?" That's the nature of the series. I've yet to sit through the previous entries, and I suspect that the older films have more bite to them, but this one did make me cringe a lot.
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53: A Christmas Karen
Probably the lowest-budget adaptation of A Christmas Carol I've ever seen. Not a terrible thing on its own though--putting a "Karen" into a Christmas movie will inevitably lean hard on the "Scroogieness" of the character, and parallels to Dickens' classic is a natural fit. Maybe a bit lazy, to be honest. But the film is moderately entertaining despite how cheap the film looks and how cheesy it plays.
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52: Moonfall
This one speaks for itself: a Roland Emmerich film in which the moon falls on the Earth. Of course it's going to be stupid.
The over-the-top premise and spectacle is almost mundane now. It doesn't help that the characters are the exact same archetypes that have been recycled in films like Independence Day: Resurgence. The story has a firm dedication to substantiate its premise, but as it indulges in its own mystery, it also laughs in the face of physics and logic. It's as mindless as they come, but the film never promised to be anything more than what's in the title.
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51: The Bad Guys
I was willing to give an animated heist movie a chance. Kids might get a kick out of it, but as an adult viewer I can't unsee the correlations to better heist movies like The Italian Job. It wouldn't surprise me if this movie inspires kids to seek out genre classics in the future. The problem is that I'm quite beyond the target audience and can only approach this backwards, meaning that I found the story twists predictable and trite. It's a cute and well-animated film, but often times the hyperbole of certain scenes struck me as overdone. It didn't do much for me personally, but there's a good chance families and kids will be more enthralled than I was.
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50: Disenchanted
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49: Firestarter
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| She is the firestarter! Wicked firestarter! *cool techno noises* |
Compared to the 80s version, this is better in some ways and worse in others. The film looks pretty good and it presents itself with a certain gravitas that the older version lacked (although the cheese of the older movie lent it a "so bad it's good" vibe that I find more watchable). The new incarnation of the story has its share of interesting scenes. I don't fault the performances much, and the music score is a standout. Beyond that though, the script leaves much to be desired, and the end result is rather lackluster.
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48: Thor: Love and Thunder
It's a fair time-waster if all you want is some pretty CGI battles and bursts of signature humor. I did yearn for more to the story though. It didn't gel together in a way that made me really care for the characters (heroes, villains, gods, kids, goats, or otherwise) or the plot. Some directions left me scratching my head. Few scenes frustrated me. Very few actually appealed (the fight scenes are okay, sure, but the montages showing Thor and Jane's relationship is probably the only time I cared about their chemistry). Perhaps it's revealing to the quality of the character and series that there's not much to explore, beyond deepening the lore of gods and god-killers, but a better script could have probably made this a real banger. I would have certainly appreciated better jokes, because this didn't make me laugh that much either.
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47: Strange World
I am naturally interested in an adventure film set in a "strange world," full of alien plant and animal life. Yes indeed, that premise piqued my interest. But I struggled to connect with the film, precisely because it has a different agenda. Moments of genuine awe and wonder are sparse in between the chaotic action scenes and the beleaguered drama among family. The thematic parallels are clear, to the point where I feel like it's designed to be one big virtual signal. But for a film that wears the influence of 30s and 40s pulp adventure on its sleeve, it just doesn't feel like it's in the same league as the classics.
They should have just given us more John Carter movies, FFS...
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46: Triangle of Sadness
I would have loved this movie more if it kept its focus on the cruise going wrong and folks struggling to survive on the island. All of that plays into the film, sure, but it's surprisingly little in a bloated drama that seems more interested in beleaguering the more mundane spaces before and in between the actual plot points. I can appreciate the inherent message behind the story, but it's rather long and droll for my taste.
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45: Bardo, False Chronicle of a Handful of Truths
I fell in love with quite a few of Alejandro González Iñárritu's films, but this is probably the first of his that I found myself struggling to care about. It's definitely not the looks of the thing--the style and cinematography are spectacular as ever, and the film's best moments are the most surreal ones. I struggled to really connect with the characters though. They seemed to wander aimlessly, and without seeming to lead anywhere, the story came off as uninteresting (if not outright boring). I'm sure there are good high-brow points being made, and it's certainly as arty of a film as they come. It just didn't compel me personally.
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44: Elvis
You just know this was going to be very glitzy and garish. Baz Luhrmann frames the King in his signature flair, going so far as whizzing the camera through CGI dreamscapes of Las Vegas with dizzying transitions and movements. The film shows no interest in an honest portrayal of Elvis, and I am rather put off by how over-dramatized the endeavor is. For a man this influential and prominent, I prefer the more grounded approach, as shown in the 70s TV movie that Kurt Russell totally nailed. This version, like lots of other things around Elvis's caricature, just comes off as tacky and fake.
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43: The Northman
I was hyped for this one. Marketing likely led me to believe this would be something different than what it actually is, but I should have known better after seeing other films by Robert Eggers.
Though the film is as beautiful as they come, it is quite a strange and slow-burning odyssey that will make The Green Knight feel action-packed. The Northman is sparse on the action, choosing instead to envelope the viewer in ambience. I found little connection to the characters and story, although I feel like I missed something. There is a chance my appreciation could go up on a rewatch (as it did with Valhalla Rising), but I kinda wish somebody would just make a viking movie that's more straightforward. All we want is a film that shows viking pillages in unflinching detail. Where's Mel Gibson when we need him?
(...wait, never mind, I found out that Mel's working on a Passion of the Christ sequel)
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42: Hocus Pocus 2
Disney just has to make a sequel to everything, don't they? At least a second Hocus Pocus feels more welcome, especially since Bette Midler, Sarah Jessica Parker, and Kathy Najimy reprise their respective roles with such effortless confidence. They remain the film's best assets and its best parts are in their continuously funny interactions with the modern world. Beyond that, the film has a rather trite story that tries to push a new group of kids as their own kind of good-witch coven, but it's not quite as snappy or original as its predecessor.
Best Hellraiser film in the last ten years by default. That's how low the bar's been set after all these dang direct-to-video sequels. This time, they bring things back to their roots, re-adapting Clive Barker's story for a new cast of characters in a more modern setting. It all feels familiar as it repeats beats from the original film and explores similar themes. The style's pretty slick (if not a little too dark) and there are some genuinely eye-popping sequences to behold. Also don't mind Jamie Clayton as the new Pinhead. The middle sags hard, but the film has a few wonderful sights to show you.
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41: Hellraiser
Best Hellraiser film in the last ten years by default. That's how low the bar's been set after all these dang direct-to-video sequels. This time, they bring things back to their roots, re-adapting Clive Barker's story for a new cast of characters in a more modern setting. It all feels familiar as it repeats beats from the original film and explores similar themes. The style's pretty slick (if not a little too dark) and there are some genuinely eye-popping sequences to behold. Also don't mind Jamie Clayton as the new Pinhead. The middle sags hard, but the film has a few wonderful sights to show you.
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40: Lightyear
On one hand, I don't feel like I really need this film (or heck, if we have this can we get a feature-length Woody's Roundup now?). I think literalizing Buzz Lightyear as a sci-fi hero is an inherently bland creative choice, since Buzz was always presented as a rather over-the-top caricature in Toy Story meant to be laughed at (just as Woody is a stereotypical cowboy). So no surprise, the Lightyear movie is a rather samey-same sci-fi adventure that offers little new to the table.
That being said, it is a fair and watchable story with a few fun moments and a likable cast. And who doesn't love Sox? The visuals are good, and the story's focus on Buzz's character is solid. It's not the grand, cheesy Star Command adventure I'd have imagined for this character, but it's not terrible either.
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39: The Munsters
The first impression of Rob Zombie's The Munsters is not a good one. It is a challenge to overlook the cheap, schlocky-looking production quality, the cheesy transition effects, and the crazy over-acting. Once Herman is brought to life and the family comes together, it becomes surprisingly charming. It's about as good or as bad as something like the Beverly Hillbillies movie that came out in the 90s--The Munsters is made with purposeful color and camp in the spirit of the original show, and even though it won't make you howl with laughter, it is harmless and cute.
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38: Uncharted
It's understandable that many critics will simply write this one off as another lame video game adaptation. It's a testament to how high the Uncharted games set the bar for gaming narratives, and to how low the bar is set for game-based movies. The film for Uncharted is bound to fall short somewhere.
Fortunately, I felt this was perfectly fine, especially when taken as simply another adventure movie. It's hardly original as it seems to recycle aspects of The DaVinci Code and makes direct references to Indiana Jones. But the film does the work to lay out the characters and give us reasons to care for them. There is just enough heart to make the dazzling stunts, exotic locations, thrilling treasure hunts, and humorous banter engaging. The theme of trust weighs in, adding dramatic depth as we question who's going to backstab who and when. It's not the best movie of its kind (and certainly not the best video game adaptation it could be), but I expected worse out of Sony.
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37: Sonic the Hedgehog 2
Pretty much on-par with the previous Sonic film, if not slightly better. The film shows more dedication to representing the source material faithfully, and it is at its best when it brings Sonic, Tails, Knuckles, Dr. Robotnik's giant machines, and chaos emeralds to life. And it connects all these together in a fairly coherent story. There is still some kid-friendly slapstick involved, but the action is certainly eye-popping. It's quite entertaining and remains one of the better video game adaptations so far.
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36: Jurassic Park: Dominion
Heck, I enjoyed the film. I was happy to see all the protagonists, from both past movies and the present, united in one mad scramble to save the world. The film promises little more, but it's quite the big and busy venture that sports enjoyable action scenes and confident quality. I admire that the film manages to find a role for every characters, leaving nobody in the dust. Lesser films would have stumbled harder--I was pretty happy with this and will accept it as a fair conclusion to the series.
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35: Explorer
I do have this film to thank for introducing me to Sir Ranulph Fiennes and his remarkable expeditions. The man's achievements are extraordinary and worth showcasing. The film takes a surprisingly more intimate approach, choosing to explore the explorer's personal relationships and his more mundane activities with only sporadic discussion on his achievements. I'd certainly have liked it more if they covered more of his journeys (they literally have a news clipping that he discovered a lost city, but they never talked about it, come on!). But the film is built with quality and it does a fair job of showcasing Fiennes' life and legacy.
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34: The Adam Project
This is an enjoyable sci-fi flick that boasts a unique premise and has some fun with it. It may seem typical for Ryan Reynolds at this point, but it is a film brimming with eye-popping action and playful humor, which keeps the tempo high. There are cute interactions among the characters, and maybe just enough heart to make it endearing. Can't say I found it perfectly cohesive or compelling, but it entertains.
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33: TÁR
It's easy to see why this film gets all the praise--Cate Blanchett commands the screen like a boss. The highs and lows of her character's story is framed with elegant cinematography and a finely-tuned script. For all its skill and elegance, I personally found the film rather slow and subtle for my taste. It's certainly a slow-burner and it doesn't hit as hard as films like Black Swan. Definitely an experience to be appreciated though.
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32: Crimes of the Future
At first glance, it seemed like David Cronenberg returned to form, going so far as turning one of his oldest short films into a modern, feature-length experience. After fifty-ish years, what we get sure is...something.
Crimes of the Future has its grotesque displays and bizarre ideas, certainly, and the cast does an admirable job of bringing the film's unique characters and ideas to life. The problem is, most of the film is comprised of long discussions that discuss interesting ideas, but rarely shows them. And this isn't the first time Cronenberg has done this--the film taps into the same ambience and tone as eXistenZ, Crash, Spider, and Dead Ringers. You have to really be invested in the discussion and performances to get anything out of these films. With Crimes of the Future, it's a little disappointing since there's less focus on actual future crimes, leaving only the bizarre chairs, surgery scenes, and plastic-eating to stand out. What is the plot again?
I suppose you can make the argument that plot doesn't matter and the film works as a form of theater. Doesn't mean I find it captivating though.
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31: Smile
Probably one of the hokier horror movies of the year, best remembered for its novel marketing, in which random people appeared at ball games smiling creepily into cameras. Fundamentally though, I found the film thrilling (and perhaps downright scary) as it focuses on an evil force terrorizing a young woman to the point of breakdown. I naturally find these kinds of stories poignant. The film achieves quite a dire tone and quite a few unnerving scares thanks in part to the creepy smiles.
Disappointed they didn't use the "Smile" song by Vitamin C though (the film's end credits actually uses the Chordette's "Lollipop," which is just trite and overused at this point).
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30: Glorious
Cosmic horror has gone to the toilet, hasn't it?
No seriously though, the film is an amusing novelty and the way it satirizes cosmic horror is rather refreshing. It's a simple film set in one location, but it remains enticing thanks to the amusing dialogue and the way it strings you along to its shocking conclusion. It might come across as silly low-budget schlock, but it makes no pretense in being anything but. Ghatanothoa demands you take a look.
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29: Bullet Train
There's nothing subtle or sophisticated with this film, but taken as goofy popcorn entertainment, there is plenty to love. There is a slight Tarantino flavor to the way it plays around with the narrative, using flashbacks and transitions to revel in gleefully violent cutaways (not to mention the overt Japanese setting, complete with samurai and mascot cats). However, David Leitch delivers his typical brand of exciting action, with firm focus on thrilling fight choreography and over-the-top stunts, and comedy, thanks to the colorful characters and their absurd situations. Of all the films this year, this might be the best "big dumb fun" I've experienced.
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28: Inside the Mind of a Cat
Aren't cats so cute? For the casual viewer, this documentary offers plenty of scenes involving cats doing cat stuff, with a smattering of interesting facts. It covers a broad scope, but with only a little depth. Chances are that those who love cats will know much of this content already--it's hardly a deep cut. Still a fair presentation and something the average viewer may find entertaining.
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27: Fall
I am a sucker for movies like this that draws out the suspense with characters trapped in crazy places. As it was with 2011's Frozen or 2016's The Shallows, I am at the edge of my seat watching these two ladies stuck on an absurdly tall tower for most of the runtime. The plot is competently built on their interactions and attempted solutions. Their decisions aren't always smart, and the finale pulls an interesting twist that's been done before in better films, but it is a fun watch all the same.
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26: X
Presented as a high-brow take on low-brow subject matter, X plays like a grungy mash-up between Boogie Nights and Texas Chainsaw Massacre. There's definitely a grotesque level of sex and violence, encapsulated in a simple plotline that offers little deviation in the standard slasher formula. It'd all feel trashy and dumb if it wasn't for the elegant cinematography and a cast of characters that feel creditably real for this environment.
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25: Three Thousand Years of Longing
George Miller invites us to sit down with a djinn for a couple of hours and hear his bizarre tales of betrayal and obsession through the ages. It's a bit of an anthology film that delivers three interesting tales set in an exotic Oriental world with magic, demons, kings, artists, and mythology (and just about all of this is definitely stuff I find interesting, and these stories are told with such vibrant panache that I can't stop admiring). The main throughline of the film--the budding relationship between Alithea and the djinn--offers fascinating encounters and insight, but in the same manner as Big Fish, the storytelling itself is more the point.
Jordan Peele reaches for the stars this time, presenting a sci-fi yarn about a UFO as a neo-western with overarching subtexts concerning the themes of spectacle and exploitation within a (potentially metafictional) frame of showmanship from the point-of-view of blue-collar workers (with maybe some hint of racial disparity). *takes a deep breath* Although I find it's best taken as a simple creature feature. The chase becomes thrilling in its last half, as the film constructs fascinating setpieces with the visual panache Peele is becoming known for. There are nuances to this film that goes over my head, but it's definitely the most unique sci-fi horror movie released this year.
The book is better.
With that out of the way, I pegged this as a fair adaptation of Delia Owen's prolific novel. It hits up all the right plot points procedurally, in the same manner the book does, with only some details left in the reeds. The story is brought to life with smooth cinematography that showcases very real-looking (and gorgeous) locations. Against the backdrop of marshes and beaches, Daisy-Edgar Jones brings Kya to life with relatability and believability (wait...she's English? Holy crap, she nailed the American accent!). By nature of the story, the film wades through quite a bit of ugly territory concerning domestic abuse and assault towards women, but the film handles it with tasteful restraint (it has to anyway for that PG-13 rating). The book was a good read that showcased a character's complex struggle for growth in isolation, and the film represents it rather well.
I can't help but to admire this film for enlightening me to a culture and a piece of history I was previously ignorant to (although I might have to check on that historical accuracy--Lupita Nyong'o thought the Agojie were sus). Still, The Woman King presents itself handsomely with real-looking production design, competent cinematography, and a snappy sound design. The script is functional, delivering dramatic turns that are interesting and plenty of thrilling battles. This is probably the best performance I've seen out of Viola Davis--it is genuinely badass and stirring. The film overall is one of the better historical epics I've seen in a while.
While suspense thrillers are quite common these days, Kimi strives for relevancy thanks to its particular focus on this time and place in history, using the pandemic as a backdrop and Alexa-stye AIs as a plot device. What makes it a worthwhile watch will be in how it strives for depth and relatability as it sticks close and personal to the protagonist (who remains compelling thanks to Zoe Kravitz's performance). Despite some dry spells, the film is fairly engaging.
Truly, this is the Citizen Kane of a very specific type of comedy film. As a biopic, I'm a little disappointed they skipped the part where Al took over a UHF TV station and beat out the competition of a major network, but they clearly put the focus on Al's steamy relationship with Madonna and the incident where he fought Pablo Escobar's regime in a major gunfight. It's all totally true of course, and never have I seen a film recreate reality with such factual detail. Especially the part where they emphasize Michael Jackson ripping off Al's song "Eat It," we all know Al penned that song first by golly! I'm only let down that they made up some silly backstory to justify placing "Amish Paradise" in the movie despite the song being produced eleven years after Al's assassination, but that's a small quibble in a film that's otherwise 100% true about 50% of the time. Weird Al's story is an inspiring legend that spans generations, and the film paints quite a nuanced and elegant portrait of this musical prodigy.
...it's pretty funny.
There are things to nitpick about the Predator franchise, but I didn't hate this new spinoff, which turns the camera lens towards Native Americans in the 1700s. I mean, why not? It's pretty badass to show these warriors using their survivalist skills and primal wit to confront an otherworldly hunter--one that's showcased to be as brutal and bloodthirsty as ever. I naturally find it interesting when sci-fi is contextualized in a historic timeframe, suggesting that myth could be a subjective interpretation of things we don't fully understand. It's the same reason why I once found 2009's Outlander fascinating. Prey doesn't make any profound theme or statement on this front, but it doesn't need to either. It makes no pretense of being anything but a bloody good Predator movie, and it delivers just what fans want: a simple story of the hunted becoming the hunter.
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24: Nope
Jordan Peele reaches for the stars this time, presenting a sci-fi yarn about a UFO as a neo-western with overarching subtexts concerning the themes of spectacle and exploitation within a (potentially metafictional) frame of showmanship from the point-of-view of blue-collar workers (with maybe some hint of racial disparity). *takes a deep breath* Although I find it's best taken as a simple creature feature. The chase becomes thrilling in its last half, as the film constructs fascinating setpieces with the visual panache Peele is becoming known for. There are nuances to this film that goes over my head, but it's definitely the most unique sci-fi horror movie released this year.
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23: Where the Crawdads Sing
The book is better.
With that out of the way, I pegged this as a fair adaptation of Delia Owen's prolific novel. It hits up all the right plot points procedurally, in the same manner the book does, with only some details left in the reeds. The story is brought to life with smooth cinematography that showcases very real-looking (and gorgeous) locations. Against the backdrop of marshes and beaches, Daisy-Edgar Jones brings Kya to life with relatability and believability (wait...she's English? Holy crap, she nailed the American accent!). By nature of the story, the film wades through quite a bit of ugly territory concerning domestic abuse and assault towards women, but the film handles it with tasteful restraint (it has to anyway for that PG-13 rating). The book was a good read that showcased a character's complex struggle for growth in isolation, and the film represents it rather well.
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22: The Woman King
I can't help but to admire this film for enlightening me to a culture and a piece of history I was previously ignorant to (although I might have to check on that historical accuracy--Lupita Nyong'o thought the Agojie were sus). Still, The Woman King presents itself handsomely with real-looking production design, competent cinematography, and a snappy sound design. The script is functional, delivering dramatic turns that are interesting and plenty of thrilling battles. This is probably the best performance I've seen out of Viola Davis--it is genuinely badass and stirring. The film overall is one of the better historical epics I've seen in a while.
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21: Marcel the Shell with Shoes On
You'd have to be one soulless monster to hate Marcel. The little shell with the shoes already had three good-looking short films about ten years ago, but Dean Fleischer-Camp evolved these bite-sized vignettes into a bigger full-length feature that pushes the scope of Marcel's tiny world. It is technically impressive how the stop-motion animation is seamlessly merged with live footage--combined with the documentary approach, the film looks creditable, as if little talking shells could actually be living among us. It is just too cute how the film showcases Marcel's livelihood using an imaginative array of household objects, and it's exceptionally endearing how Jenny Slate continues to lend Marcel his distinctively raspy voice (which, in turn, is something like ASMR). It'd all be just a flimsy novelty if it wasn't for the focus on community and family--the film really reaches for the heartstrings with its story, and it is rather successful. I'm not usually into things this quirky, but it's all just too cute!
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20: Kimi
While suspense thrillers are quite common these days, Kimi strives for relevancy thanks to its particular focus on this time and place in history, using the pandemic as a backdrop and Alexa-stye AIs as a plot device. What makes it a worthwhile watch will be in how it strives for depth and relatability as it sticks close and personal to the protagonist (who remains compelling thanks to Zoe Kravitz's performance). Despite some dry spells, the film is fairly engaging.
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19: Weird: The Al Yankovic Story
Truly, this is the Citizen Kane of a very specific type of comedy film. As a biopic, I'm a little disappointed they skipped the part where Al took over a UHF TV station and beat out the competition of a major network, but they clearly put the focus on Al's steamy relationship with Madonna and the incident where he fought Pablo Escobar's regime in a major gunfight. It's all totally true of course, and never have I seen a film recreate reality with such factual detail. Especially the part where they emphasize Michael Jackson ripping off Al's song "Eat It," we all know Al penned that song first by golly! I'm only let down that they made up some silly backstory to justify placing "Amish Paradise" in the movie despite the song being produced eleven years after Al's assassination, but that's a small quibble in a film that's otherwise 100% true about 50% of the time. Weird Al's story is an inspiring legend that spans generations, and the film paints quite a nuanced and elegant portrait of this musical prodigy.
...it's pretty funny.
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18: Prey
There are things to nitpick about the Predator franchise, but I didn't hate this new spinoff, which turns the camera lens towards Native Americans in the 1700s. I mean, why not? It's pretty badass to show these warriors using their survivalist skills and primal wit to confront an otherworldly hunter--one that's showcased to be as brutal and bloodthirsty as ever. I naturally find it interesting when sci-fi is contextualized in a historic timeframe, suggesting that myth could be a subjective interpretation of things we don't fully understand. It's the same reason why I once found 2009's Outlander fascinating. Prey doesn't make any profound theme or statement on this front, but it doesn't need to either. It makes no pretense of being anything but a bloody good Predator movie, and it delivers just what fans want: a simple story of the hunted becoming the hunter.
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17: The Banshees of Inisherin
Doesn't it feel aggravating to be ghosted? Martin McDonagh's recent film draws out all the agony, spite, and humor out of this simple premise against the beautiful backdrop of Ireland. Colin Farrell and Brendan Gleeson flex impressive acting chops as their characters escalate the plot into shocking twists. There's a subtle poignancy as the colorful personalities and dry humor clashes with the inevitable violence, and in a truly artistic stroke, the film leaves much open for interpretation and discussion.
Nicolas Cage plays Nicolas Cage. Acting has officially peaked, folks!
There is certainly a meta angle to this picture that banks on Cage's persona, but it plays into the story so well that it becomes a fascinating and funny yarn in its own right. Cage fans will probably get a kick out of the plethora of references. But the core story is a fun tale built on the convincing comradery between the two leads, and it builds up to a fair amount of exciting action. It's a satisfying watch in the end, and Cage is the man!
Sometimes, unbridled absurdity without pretense is a sheer joy to watch. It's the reason why I was briefly obsessed with Timur Bekmambetov's work until Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter--I was enamored by spectacle that ignored physics and aimed to simply look as awesome as possible. The biggest draw of RRR is that it does the same--nearly every scene in this insane picture is depicted in such an over-the-top manner that it'll elicit thrills (and perhaps laughter). At its core though, the films keeps a firm focus on the characters and their bond, which is enough to lend it heart and soul that makes even the most ridiculous of scenes (like the weird dancing with the suspender-pulling) charming. Three hours just fly by in this whirlwind of cartoony mayhem and heartwarming storytelling, invoking a joy I hadn't felt in a long time.
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16: The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent
Nicolas Cage plays Nicolas Cage. Acting has officially peaked, folks!
There is certainly a meta angle to this picture that banks on Cage's persona, but it plays into the story so well that it becomes a fascinating and funny yarn in its own right. Cage fans will probably get a kick out of the plethora of references. But the core story is a fun tale built on the convincing comradery between the two leads, and it builds up to a fair amount of exciting action. It's a satisfying watch in the end, and Cage is the man!
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15: RRR
Sometimes, unbridled absurdity without pretense is a sheer joy to watch. It's the reason why I was briefly obsessed with Timur Bekmambetov's work until Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter--I was enamored by spectacle that ignored physics and aimed to simply look as awesome as possible. The biggest draw of RRR is that it does the same--nearly every scene in this insane picture is depicted in such an over-the-top manner that it'll elicit thrills (and perhaps laughter). At its core though, the films keeps a firm focus on the characters and their bond, which is enough to lend it heart and soul that makes even the most ridiculous of scenes (like the weird dancing with the suspender-pulling) charming. Three hours just fly by in this whirlwind of cartoony mayhem and heartwarming storytelling, invoking a joy I hadn't felt in a long time.
Hot dang, I need more Indian cinema in my life.
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14: Pearl
One must appreciate the energy Ti West exudes as he bangs out not one, not two, but three of these horror movies with Mia Goth. The second of the X trifecta is a prequel focused on the titular Pearl, whom Goth brings to life with striking personality and nuance. From the first frame onward, the film presents itself with class and style that hints at simpler, more innocent times, but is overshadowed by the violent downward spiral that inevitably occurs. The contrast alone is stark and convincing, and Pearl's character arc is compelling enough to sustain the picture. Truly a troubling and messed-up portrait of a girl with big dreams that are inevitably shattered by passion and outrage--this might be the most effective horror movie prequel I've seen so far.
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13: Pinocchio (Guillermo Del Toro)
Some fairy tales deserve the dark treatment, and Del Toro putting a dark fantasy spin on Pinocchio is an effortless fit. Although it retains some familiar elements we will recognize from the Disney incarnations, Del Toro animates the tale against the grim backdrop of war and fascism. Combined with the core elements of the original tale (with emphasis on Pinocchio as a mindless automaton), there is definitely some meaningful bite to this adaptation. The added creatures and mythology keeps it aligned with Del Toro's imagination, but it also layers insightful themes of mortality. It's not all doom and gloom though--the film retains a certain cartoony spark through its colorful script, vibrant voice-acting, and snappy pace. It's definitely an interesting new take on the classic tale, and it's the kind of thing I wish Tim Burton would have delivered with some of his recent movies.
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12: Turning Red
Yes, yes, it's an animated coming-of-age movie with metaphors about puberty and sh*t. Calm down.
While I wish the film's opening was less in-your-face, it settles into a rather fun groove that offers a few good laughs, plenty of eye-popping color and whimsy, and heartfelt messages concerning maturity and identity. There is good thematic material worth unpacking, with emotional resonance where it's warranted. I'm probably as far away from the target audience as I can be, but even I found it charming in the end.
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11: The Menu
With admirable skill and restraint, Ralph Fiennes plays a chef whose menu includes exposure and pain. It's a sharp and poignant satire that inevitably slants into gripping thrills and terror, and I found this particular dining experience enthralling that way. Framed with elegant cinematography (with special emphasis on cuisine close-ups--man that food looks good), the film presents itself with a certain class that contrasts with its violent premise. In doing so, it comes loaded with themes and messages concerning art and its reception (in addition to the usual "eat the rich" schtick, which might go hand-in-hand with the pretension of evaluating food anyway). With or without the characterization or themes, it remains a good thriller at its core. Simply, a good film. Not some fancy, deconstructed, affluent bullsh*t, a real film.
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10: Top Gun: Maverick
A few years ago, I would have pegged it as a dumb idea to follow up on Top Gun, given all the meme-worthy cheese the original film is known for (and Hollywood's spotty track record for nostalgia-baited sequels in general). I'm happy to be proven wrong through, the film is probably the most surprising hit of the year. Tom Cruise shows admirable dedication to the part (did he really fly those planes?!). Thankfully, the script shows dedication too as it puts the focus on characters and their bonds, lending the film an emotional core that surpasses the novelty of mere aircraft pilots performing an impossible mission. However, the mission is an impressive showcase in itself, presenting awe-inspiring feats that blows away anything the 1986 film had. I should have known that Joseph Kosinski could pull it off--the man brought Tron back to life once, and he did it again with Top Gun. The dude has a gift for bringing the 80s back.
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9: Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness
Marketed as Marvel's first foray into horror, Doctor Strange's latest adventure is not quite the insane multiverse-hopping experience one would expect. You know what I love about it though? It's a chase film, plain and simple. A chase that happens to fling the titular sorcerer across space and time through an eye-popping phantasmagoria populated with alternate evil characters and a fantastic mythology rooted in monsters, dangerous books, magic, and the macabre. No surprise that Sam Raimi takes the director's chair on this, and he does a competent job steering the chase through a number of exciting setpieces and uncanny situations. Heck, the musical duel scene might be one of the most inventive things I've seen in a while (bravo, Danny Elfman). I know that many viewers don't care for the story's approach, especially regarding the villain and the limitations put on a supposedly limitless multiverse, but I appreciate what we're given: an enjoyable romp with a creepy, surreal edge.
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8: Glass Onion
A Knives Out Mystery
Just as Pierrot and Holmes have many cases under their belt, it only makes sense that Benoit Blanc should carry his own franchise and solve more murders beyond the events of Knives Out. While it's an impossible task to make lightning strike twice, Glass Onion strives for its own identity thanks to its exotic location and colorful production quality. It's becoming clear that identifying the murderer in these films isn't nearly as interesting as discovering how the clues are revealed and peeling back the layers to reveal the cracks in the glass. Indeed, the joy of peeling the "glass onion" is the peeling itself, and Daniel Craig maintains a delightful personality as he does the peeling and spits the truth to a cast of rich a-holes we just love to hate. Rian Johnson's snappy and subversive tone remains sharp and clear as he steers the story to a punchline ending.
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7: Avatar: The Way of Water
 |
| That's crazy. Who would travel hundreds of light-years to talk to a whale? |
It's been thirteen years. I had taken the wait for granted for so long, and I've becomes so accustomed to the universal complaints concerning the first film (what with it being just Dances With Wolves with smurfs or some sh*t) that I genuinely didn't expect much. I should have kept my faith in James Cameron though, because Avatar: The Way of Water is one of the biggest, most expensive, most eye-popping hits of the year, but the release is so low-key that it feels like a dang good sleeper hit.
Thirteen years' worth of work is definitely seen here, as Cameron continues to show off the magnificent world of Pandora, taking us to the deep seas now with a new biome of colorful wonders. A good chunk of the film is built from many "slice of life" scenes that might pad the runtime a bit, but even when characters spend all of some time swimming with whales, it never really felt like a three hour film to me. The pacing remains snappy, while the script genuinely does the work to keep us attached to the characters (now grown into a nice blue family) while it layers enough stakes and conflicts that keeps narrative momentum high. For a movie that's focused on just a family on the run, it still manages to feel bigger than it is as it showcases new threats, new tech, and new weapons in the hands of old enemies. There's definitely a big bang and a lot of visual splendor, but it remains compelling thanks to the personal touch added to the characters.
You know what? I don't care what anybody else says. I care about Jake Sully and his family of smurfs. Even if it means never having good high-def versions of True Lies or The Abyss, I support the next few chapters of this saga and I'm looking forward to what's coming next!
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6: Moonage Daydream
With the blessings of the Bowie estate, Brett Morgen assembled this film with concert footage and archival film that has never been seen before. While it's novel and refreshing to see these sights, this is a film that is designed to be experienced rather than merely "watched." Its flashy transitions and dreamy imagery lucidly string the concert and movie footage together into a psychedelic stream of consciousness, effectively marrying substance and style. There are insights and thrills to be found, but it's greatest value is in how well it reflects David Bowie's own brand of otherworldly glam while showcasing his unique talents in music and art.
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5: Mad God
The one and only Phil Tippett spent 30 years bringing Mad God to life with his impressive talents in creature design and animation. Naturally, the film's effects, monsters, and world-building are its best features. It isn't an easy film to digest, given its esoteric storytelling (mostly lacking in dialogue) and bleak, nihilistic tone. The experience is memorably vivid though, immersing the viewer in an insane world full of strange and horrific encounters. The story is not easy to interpret, but it does lead to a mind-blowing finale that makes the endeavor feel unified. Given the scope and vision of the production, I can't help but to admire the effort no matter how esoteric it seems.
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4: The Black Phone
This might just be riding the coat tails of 2017's IT, but I am floored by the effort Black Phone makes to present Joe Hill's short story with quality and dedication. From frame one, the film is handsomely-framed with arresting cinematography and performances. Even though Ethan Hawke takes the top credit, just about all of the child actors and supporting cast show admirable skill that brings their characters to life. They populate a captivating story with a pitch-black tone, and I'm quite impressed by how efficiently the script aligns its setups and payoffs. It is a unified picture that might remind you of many other Stephen King or Joe Hill stories, but it is a thrilling watch and a real whopper of a story. Easily my favorite horror movie of the year.
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3: The Batman
Batman has been represented in so many ways (everything from a cartoon caricature to a gritty vigilante to a ninja to a literal monster), and making another serious adaptation feels a little mundane. It's presumptuous to assume that 2022's THE Batman will be definitive, but it comes pretty dang close.
Matt Reeves, as dependable of a filmmaker as ever, gives the Dark Knight an appropriately grim backdrop to showcase a grounded detective story. The film takes its time to steep the audience in mood and ambience, enveloping everyone in brooding darkness. Clues give way to revelations that challenge morality and values, but it builds to an impressively tense climax by the end. Though this is hardly a perfect plotline, it remains captivating thanks to the characters, all brought to life with gravitas by an immensely talented cast (who would have thought that the Twilight guy could pull it off? Seriously though, Pattinson is a champ, as is Kravitz, Paul Dano, and Colin Farrell). Taking cues from the best David Fincher films, The Batman has a dark and handsome style that showcases the grit and corruption of the city in an artful way--the cinematography and music alone will elicit chills. Action hits hard when it needs to, but it's not the biggest draw. Take it as a mystery featuring the world's greatest detective, and it is a mesmerizing experience to be deeply felt and deeply admired.
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2: All Quiet on the Western Front
Im Westen Nichts Neues
This story's been told a few times now, but the experience and anti-war themes remain timeless, and it becomes apparent when it's retold with skilled talent. Edward Berger directs the third cinematic incarnation of this tale with sincerity, expertly immersing us in the horrors of war framed in elegant cinematography and painted with poignant detail. There are divergences from the original novel and the 1930 film that redirect our thematic attention, but I find that the added focus on out-of-touch leaders creates a scathing contrast with the boots-on-the-ground perspective, and it is an insight worth exploring. With its dire imagery and strangely industrial music score, the film stands alongside 1917 as one of the most striking war films of the modern age. The fact that this WWI tale remains relevant today only substantiates the adage from one of my favorite video games: war never changes.
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1: Everything Everywhere All At Once
This is a neat little indie film about a woman who can access her other selves in the multiverse. It gets really crazy when the movie starts jumping around different universes, but it's a good movie all the same. I went in with no real knowledge or expectations for what to expect, but it kept my interest as it gradually layered on more and more exciting scenes. There’s definitely a lot of skill both in front and behind the camera, and a lot of heart emerged out of the story. I really liiiiiiikkk̷͙̉k̴̨̀—
—I may be a simple farmer from Alabama but I sure as hell won’t stand by any longer and let my daughter be corrupted by the trash those commies from Hollywood keep pumping out. Everything in this film is amoral garbage, and I pray to Jesus and that all those who saw and liked this filth will beeeeeeee̶e̷ẻ̴̡̧̛̮͚̄͝—
—in sharp contrast to the Copenhagen interpretation of quantum mechanics, the film seems to represent the many-worlds interpretation, in which there is no wave function collapse, and an infinite number of alternate realities branch off of ours based on a large number of variations, including personal choice. Of course, free will has been disproven by science, but the film makes nooooooô̴̝̥̅̄ỏ̶̼͂͘ͅo̷̧̭̯̟͓̐͐—
—in sharp contrast to the Copenhagen interpretation of quantum mechanics, the film seems to represent the many-worlds interpretation, in which there is no wave function collapse, and an infinite number of alternate realities branch off of ours based on a large number of variations, including personal choice. Of course, free will has been disproven by science, but the film makes nooooooô̴̝̥̅̄ỏ̶̼͂͘ͅo̷̧̭̯̟͓̐͐—
—Evelyn gawked at her husband, who stood poised to fight with his feet spread apart wide. Just moments ago, he was such a pathetic loser. Now, he wielded the fanny pack in his hands, which undulated in his hands in expectation. The guards closed in with their batons, and Waymond flung the pack expertly as if it was an iron ball on a chain. The pack struck the first guard squarely in the cheeeeeeee̴͈͌e̷̖̊ę̶̡̗̞̯͔͔̘͛̀̌—
—not use your cellphone while watching the film. Do pay close attention to the shifting aspect ratio and be prepared to discuss its importance to the perceived “reality” of the story. Also pay attention to the editing style of the film and be prepared to write a 1500 word essay onnnnnnnn̷̬̮̆͆n̷͙̺͛̋̉n̴̟̭̥͎̭̘̑̃—
—not use your cellphone while watching the film. Do pay close attention to the shifting aspect ratio and be prepared to discuss its importance to the perceived “reality” of the story. Also pay attention to the editing style of the film and be prepared to write a 1500 word essay onnnnnnnn̷̬̮̆͆n̷͙̺͛̋̉n̴̟̭̥͎̭̘̑̃—
—it’s lit that they have this Chinese immigrant family and lesbian characters, but bruh, so much of this was cringe and I think the Daniels are sus, ngl. I don’t mean to sound salty, I’m not triggered by it, but my bae be like, “this is some bullshiiiiiiȉ̷̱i̴̫͗i̶͎̚ì̸̧̨͓͈͔͓͘—
—चलचित्रं द्रुतं धावति, कदापि न मुञ्चति च। लौकिकं करलेखापरीक्षामपि रोमाञ्चकं करोति, प्रेक्षकाणां कृते गलीचां बहिः आकृष्य निरपेक्षव्यर्थतायां शिरसा गोतां कर्तुं पूर्वम्। त्रिषु अभिनयेषु चलचित्रं निरन्तरं वर्धतेतेतेतेतेतेतेतेतेते—
—big enough scale of space and time, everything just doesn’t matter anymore. And for Jobu, who had achieved invincibility through all her universe-hopping, she had no morality and no care for the consequences of her actions. She became a nihilist. And when Evelyn tapped into the full potential of every universe, she also succumbed to nihilism. I relate to it, because for a time, I also felt the dark pull of nihilism. Nothing really matters when you think about it long and hard enough. But as I was watching this movie, it took an unexpected turn—Evelyn proved that the answer to nihilism is not self-destruction, as one would think. It’s love. She learns to love everyone around her, and even when she lets go of her daughter, it is an act of love. The film’s best lesson is that you have to find your own purpose in a meaningless existence. Once I realized that, and learned to find my purpose through love and family, everything turned out okaaaayyyyyyy̶͚͊ỳ̶̧y̴̲͠y̷̡̢̼̼̝̥͍̮̱͕̥̙̓̓̄̿—
—hey, can anybody help me? I want to buy the exact same kind of statue that was on the lady’s desk in the movie. For science. If anybody knows somebody in the prop department, I’m willing tooooơ̵̟õ̴̱ò̶͕ǫ̷̇õ̵̻̝—
—eating his mashed potatoes, Alan continued to type his write-up of Everything Everywhere All At Once in MS Word. It had grown to a full page, and he grew concerned that all his buddies on Blogger would consider this overly pretentious and droll. Especially since Cinemasins did this same multiverse gag already. Nevertheless, Alan found the exercise enjoyable aaaaaaa̵̡̒n̴͉̾n̶̲͂n̸͔̐n̴͉̹͖̙̊̂̂̍n̵̨̧̧͚͇̬̓—
—चलचित्रं द्रुतं धावति, कदापि न मुञ्चति च। लौकिकं करलेखापरीक्षामपि रोमाञ्चकं करोति, प्रेक्षकाणां कृते गलीचां बहिः आकृष्य निरपेक्षव्यर्थतायां शिरसा गोतां कर्तुं पूर्वम्। त्रिषु अभिनयेषु चलचित्रं निरन्तरं वर्धतेतेतेतेतेतेतेतेतेते—
—big enough scale of space and time, everything just doesn’t matter anymore. And for Jobu, who had achieved invincibility through all her universe-hopping, she had no morality and no care for the consequences of her actions. She became a nihilist. And when Evelyn tapped into the full potential of every universe, she also succumbed to nihilism. I relate to it, because for a time, I also felt the dark pull of nihilism. Nothing really matters when you think about it long and hard enough. But as I was watching this movie, it took an unexpected turn—Evelyn proved that the answer to nihilism is not self-destruction, as one would think. It’s love. She learns to love everyone around her, and even when she lets go of her daughter, it is an act of love. The film’s best lesson is that you have to find your own purpose in a meaningless existence. Once I realized that, and learned to find my purpose through love and family, everything turned out okaaaayyyyyyy̶͚͊ỳ̶̧y̴̲͠y̷̡̢̼̼̝̥͍̮̱͕̥̙̓̓̄̿—
—hey, can anybody help me? I want to buy the exact same kind of statue that was on the lady’s desk in the movie. For science. If anybody knows somebody in the prop department, I’m willing tooooơ̵̟õ̴̱ò̶͕ǫ̷̇õ̵̻̝—
—eating his mashed potatoes, Alan continued to type his write-up of Everything Everywhere All At Once in MS Word. It had grown to a full page, and he grew concerned that all his buddies on Blogger would consider this overly pretentious and droll. Especially since Cinemasins did this same multiverse gag already. Nevertheless, Alan found the exercise enjoyable aaaaaaa̵̡̒n̴͉̾n̶̲͂n̸͔̐n̴͉̹͖̙̊̂̂̍n̵̨̧̧͚͇̬̓—
—better watch out ‘cuz my pinkies are kung fu,
I don’t care if you are licking the wall,
I know the secret of the hidden racoon,
now look out where that puppy's gonna fall!
Everything (everything), everywhere (everywhere),
everything everywhere all at once! (x2)
[guitar solooooooǒ̴̲ó̵̪o̸͚͐ọ̴̰̯̅̎͘̕͝—
—that’s best taken as an experience. All the sentimentality, absurdism, shock, and wonder—just sit back and let the film wash over you.
Just be a rock.
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Favorite film: Everything Everywhere All At Once
Least favorite film: The Requin
Favorite blockbuster: Avatar: The Way of Water
Favorite arthouse film: The Menu
Favorite science fiction film: Everything Everywhere All At Once
Favorite fantasy/epic: Avatar: The Way of Water
Favorite drama film: All Quiet on the Western Front
Favorite action film: Everything Everywhere All At Once
Favorite superhero film: THE BATMAN
Favorite comedy film: Everything Everywhere All At Once
Favorite horror film: The Black Phone
Favorite documentary: Moonage Daydream
Favorite animated/family film: Turning Red
Favorite foreign film: All Quiet on the Western Front
Biggest guilty pleasure: Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness
Most disappointing film: (Robert Zemeckis') Pinocchio
Favorite male performance: Paul Dano in The Batman
Favorite female performance: Michelle Yeoh in Everything Everywhere All At Once
Favorite direction: Matt Reeves, The Batman
Favorite action scenes: Avatar: The Way of Water
Favorite special effects: Avatar: The Way of Water
Favorite film score: Michael Giacchino's score for The Batman
Favorite musical sequence: "Naacho Naacho" from RRR
Least favorite film: The Requin
Favorite blockbuster: Avatar: The Way of Water
Favorite arthouse film: The Menu
Favorite science fiction film: Everything Everywhere All At Once
Favorite fantasy/epic: Avatar: The Way of Water
Favorite drama film: All Quiet on the Western Front
Favorite action film: Everything Everywhere All At Once
Favorite superhero film: THE BATMAN
Favorite comedy film: Everything Everywhere All At Once
Favorite horror film: The Black Phone
Favorite documentary: Moonage Daydream
Favorite animated/family film: Turning Red
Favorite foreign film: All Quiet on the Western Front
Biggest guilty pleasure: Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness
Most disappointing film: (Robert Zemeckis') Pinocchio
Favorite male performance: Paul Dano in The Batman
Favorite female performance: Michelle Yeoh in Everything Everywhere All At Once
Favorite direction: Matt Reeves, The Batman
Favorite action scenes: Avatar: The Way of Water
Favorite special effects: Avatar: The Way of Water
Favorite film score: Michael Giacchino's score for The Batman
Favorite musical sequence: "Naacho Naacho" from RRR
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2023 Films Al Is Looking Forward To
Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania: Sure, let's see where this goes. I understand that Kang is part of this story and all, but I'm just intrigued to see more of the subatomic worlds that the Ant-Man movies show off so very well.
Dune Part 2: Obviously, I was enamored by how part 1 turned out, and I'm optimistic that the next part is going to be great. Especially considering that the set-up is done already, and now there is a bigger climax to look forward to and more interesting twists along the way.
Guardians of the Galaxy Volume 3: With James Gunn back in the director's chair, I expect nothing less than the same level of quality, excitement, and hilarity that made the first two parts snappy and fun. It's great to have three of these helmed by the same director, I expect it'll be a great trilogy when it's all wrapped up.
John Wick: Chapter 4: Sure, let's see where this goes. The series is far displaced from the sincerity of the first film, but the sheer absurdity of the sequels is too entertaining to ignore the upcoming chapter(s).
Mission Impossible: Dead Reckoning Part 1: Sure, let's see where this goes. I enjoyed this series the most over the past few entries, and with the same talent involved I expect this two-parter to be pretty exciting.
Oppenheimer: Strictly on account of having Christopher Nolan in the director's chair. No idea what to expect other than style and drama (hopefully it won't get too crazy messing with time or anything). It could be interesting.
The Super Mario Bros Movie: It's been decades, but it's hard to forget about the 1990s live-action film and how much of a misfire it was. From what I see in the trailers, Illumination brings the iconic Mario Bros characters and world to life with pleasing levels of faithfulness and humor. Not sure if Chris Pratt is a good choice for Mario's voice, but holy crap, Jack Black is perfect for Bowser. Everything else looks on-brand and I'm genuinely interested to see if this will stick together.
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